In the summer of 2021, I celebrated a milestone birthday in North Carolina’s Blue Ridge Mountains with my husband. I’d told him I wanted a low-key birthday with plenty of quiet, and he delivered. One of my surprises was an incredible picnic curated by the Asheville Picnic Company (check them out!). Someone in town recommended having the picnic at the top of a low-impact-but-scenic hike unknown to most tourists.

We took that advice. But, not being much of a hiker, I didn’t realize I had worn all the wrong things, including a thick cotton dress and $2 Old Navy flip flops.

The 90° F temp that day turned my dress into what I figured would become my inevitable death shroud. And my flip flops kept sliding through the soil and rocks that were dampened by the previous day’s rain. I was a literal hot mess.

The biggest problem, however, was that I was so out of shape I could barely make it to the top. I knew I was in trouble when toddlers and old people with canes (and not the kind for hiking) kept passing us.

This was weird for me, because before I entered motherhood and neared my 40s, I’d never struggled to exercise, lose weight, or maintain stamina.

But, my last pregnancies put me on a downslide. I was also commuting from Atlanta, Georgia to Des Moines, Iowa almost every week. Naturally, this made marriage and parenting a lot harder.

In all of this, I didn’t sleep much. I ate whatever was convenient on the late night commutes to hotels and short-term rentals. And, the only exercise I got was walking between airport gates.

In the previous five years leading up to that birthday hike, I’d gained 70 pounds.

It hadn’t especially bothered me. I’d noticed, but I hadn’t really noticed. I guess I was hustling and grinding so much that everything was a blur. I was constantly rushing around and not stopping to consider whether I was taking care of myself.

By the time we got to the top of the hike and found a picnic spot on that hot summer day, my brain was racing.

• How had I gotten to the point where a kid in Pull-Ups could out-walk me?
• Why hadn’t I paid more attention to mirrors or a scale? (this was an easy answer—I’d avoided them like the plague)
• What should I do now? Like, was it even possible to snap back and lose weight so many years later?
• Why, Lord, didn’t I wear a different outfit?

I wasn’t just physically worn out. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. The top of this hike wasn’t just about me needing to get in physical shape. Yeah, I needed to exercise more. But I also needed REST.

I decided that if I didn’t die in my death-shroud-dress that day, I would exercise consistently, eat better, and take a break from nearly everything else.

As soon as we left North Carolina, I created a fitness formula that helped me focus on these goals. As of today, I’ve exercised consistently for 600 days, eaten decently well, and lost 65 pounds. And, my mental health is better than its ever been.

My fitness formula includes four things: prayer, meditation, moving my body, and paying attention to what I eat. While I didn’t create it solely to lose weight, that has certainly been a byproduct.

Pray, but not necessarily to lose weight

First, I know talking about prayer may sound kind of *woo-woo.* When people ask me how I’ve made such a drastic transformation and I answer “prayer,” most respond with something like, “yeah okay but did you DOOOO to lose weight???”

But, what I’ve learned about myself is that my body refuses to do anything that my brain doesn’t believe in. And all of my beliefs start with my faith and belief in God.

I don’t know whether I could have made a consistent lifestyle change, lost a pound, or kept it off without inviting God in first.

So, I started talking to God and praying the ACTS prayer:

• Adoration – praising God for who God is
• Confession – admitting where I’d failed or done things that made me distant from God
• Thanksgiving – expressing gratitude for all things
• Supplication – asking for what I needed and praying for the needs of others

I love this prayer structure because it helps me figure out what to say to God when I really didn’t know what to say. It makes prayer much easier for me.

However, the harder part was hearing God’s responses. I wasn’t sure when, where or how I got any prayers answered!

Today, I am still learning how to listen for and hear God’s voice. Reverend Howard-John Wesley’s sermons have been my primary guides. One of my favorite recent series is “Can You Hear Me Now,” where Reverend Wesley explains the different ways God speaks to different people.

Learning how to both pray and hear God led me to the right therapist, life coach, trainers, YouTube channels, food…you name it. And each of these helped me take better care of myself.

Ultimately, every aspect of my life changed after I incorporated a daily ACTS prayer into it.

Meditate each day

Second, meditation is teaching me how to be present, calm and focused. Before practicing meditation, busy-ness was my constant state of being. My regular excuse for…just about everything…was that I didn’t have time. Because of this, I was always multitasking but never feeling “done” with anything.

When I created my fitness formula, I knew I needed daily meditation. I had tried it off and on for more than a decade, and I always felt better when I did it. But, I only did it every now and then because I was just too busy being busy!

Today, I make the time for meditation by doing it during the first hour of my day. I typically set my alarm clock a little bit early so that I can start my day with both prayer and meditation. If I’m in a rush, I still take 10 minutes either during lunch or before bed to meditate.

It’s not been a perfect journey, but meditation helps me accept things as they come without judgment, including how I spend my time and my body feels and looks.

Move every day

Third, I’ve had to get intentional and creative with how I move my body. I don’t go to the gym much, so 85% of my workout routine has been at home and outdoors.

Originally, I started with 30 minutes of cardio each day—primarily walking outdoors. I also incorporate walk at home videos on YouTube when I prefer to be indoors.

After getting over the initial exercise hump, I added 30 additional minutes of HIIT or weight lifting each day. There are a lot of popular guided exercise programs, but I mostly use Apple Fitness+, which is less than $10/month. Apple Fitness+ offers audio and video workouts plus guided meditations.

Finally, I use an Apple Watch to make sure my heart rate is high enough to burn a decent amount of calories. If you rock with Apple, my Move goal is 720 calories/day.

In full transparency, it’s a constant struggle for me to avoid the “must lose weight” beating drum…especially when the scale doesn’t move at my desired pace or direction. But, I’ve still managed to keep moving, even if some days it’s more of a slow drag.

Pay attention to what you eat

Someone once told me that you can’t out-exercise a bad diet, and this has definitely been true for me. While I don’t deprive myself (I’m the anti-Gwyneth Paltrow), I do have simple guidelines for eating based on my body type.

Instead of labeling foods good or bad, I focus on calculating my macros—protein, carbs, and fat—and tracking them + my daily calories on the Lose It! app. Measuring these numbers has been the absolute best predictor of my fitness results.

Early on, my sister taught me about the importance of macros and paying more attention to them than calories. Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor (my sister is!), but, as I understand macros, they give our bodies energy and can predict how satisfied/hungry you’ll feel after eating.

Now, macros are just the tip of the fitness iceberg. You could probably hit ideal macro numbers, and even lose weight, without ever eating a fruit or vegetable. That doesn’t mean you can throw out all the broccoli though. My basic approach is to eat colorful plants most of the time and do my best to hit those macro goals. That’s about it.

Originally, I hated the concept of measuring and counting food. It felt like overkill and doing way too much in an already busy day.

But, it isn’t too bad most days with a tracking app. At this point, even if I miss a few days (or weeks) of tracking, I can just about predict how my body will respond to what I’ve eaten.

In sum, paying attention to what I eat has actually given me more flexibility because I know what’s coming next. If I’ve eaten colorful plants most of the day, I know exactly how I’ll feel that night. And, if I have a weekend full of pizza and whiskey, like I did this past weekend, I’m fully aware of what Monday will look like!

Final Thoughts

I’ve thought about that 2021 birthday hike about a million times since we did it. The peak was beautiful, the picnic was amazing, and I’m grateful for the fun we had.

I’m also grateful for the nagging questions I had that led to my current practice of prayer, meditation, movement, and paying attention to what I eat.

I needed to do less of everything else so that I could do more taking care of myself. I’m still on the journey and have some goals yet to be reached, but the formula I’ve shared here is keeping me on track.

What do you do to take care of yourself? Drop a comment and let me know below.